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A kid working a dull office accountant job gets entangled on a professional hitman association when a pretty lady killer with botoxed lips tells him his father was a top assassin within their fraternity and he should have the same talent. He gets trained to bring down the baddy super killer, but what he gets instead is new insight into the larger mechanisms of the world, a new father and Morgan Freeman.

I don’t mind that kind of film, actually. When you are home from work, already tired, only just able to slurch towards the sofa corner and pop on the tv and turn the volume to “braindead”, this is exactly the thing that should be on (the best for that purpose is actually “Enemy of the State” – ah no, maybe “The Rock”, but you cannot watch those two every day. Maybe two week breaks required). Problem with this one: Angelina Jolie looks like an Ethiopian stravation victim on heroin, Morgan Freeman looks like God with a remote control (in this case: a big weaving machine, no kidding…), and the boy is called Wesley like the hero in Wiliam Goldman’s “Princess Bride”, but cannot fence, and looks like James McAvoy. Would be much better if he was called Derek and looked like a proper man. (check out the amusing BBC 5 live Mark Kermode review as always – McAvoy with a six-pack… ridiculous!). Also ridiculous the most superfluous train crash in the history of too many (only justified ones: “Runanway Train”, and that “find the one-armed killer” thingy with Tommy Lee Jones and Harrison Ford). Also I don’t like car chases, of which there is one that’s too long.
Otherwise: enjoyable rubbish by a director who will spend the rest of his life trapped in slow-motion, is what he deserves!
Angeline Jolie is still in good shape when filmed naked from behind, even after spending the last two years in childbed.

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