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There are only problems with the 2011 remake of “The Thing” (yes, I know they say it’s a prequel, but seriously…):

  • Nothing in this film is in any way better than in the authoritative John Carpenter version: not the story, not the script, not the special effects, not the actors. In particular not the actors. Not the lighting, sound or editing, nothing!
  • There is not a single original idea in this, mostly we have to watch generic “spooky situations”, or copies of scenes from the Carpenter movie that are just not half as well done as they were in 1982. There may be individual fun cgi effects such as a double headed monster or a monster melting into a victim, but it is random, there is no hint of a proper original idea. This culminates in the “blood sample scene”, which teaches film students that one thing they should never try to do is re-stage a scene that is commonly seen to be perfect already. It is a bit embarrassing to watch them try, really.
  • Nothing original, down to the blood samples… and clearly Carpenter had a way of creating tension that these guys do not possess
  • There is not a single identifiable character in this. Even the girl that is supposed to be the main character or “heroine” – does anybody really know or care who she is, why she is there, what function she fulfils. Does anybody remember any name of any of the characters? Or a character feature? Nothing.
  • Nobody in this is cool. In the 1982 version, Kurt Russell is cool. The doctor going crazy and building a spaceship under the shed is cool. Childs is cool. The chess computer and the dogs are even cooler than any of the characters in the remake.

No really, what a waste of time and money, only to create something that is inferior in every single aspect to John Carpenter’s masterpiece. Need to see that one again soon to cleanse me of this 2011 nonsense.

One Comment

  1. I had the same problems with the blood test scene. It was very poor. And like you say, this is a remake dressed up to look a bit like a prequel (which is nothing more than a marketing ploy).

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